A lawyer was well into a lengthy cross-examination of a witness, stopped and said: "I object, Your Honor! One of the jurors is asleep."
The Judge ruled: "You put him to sleep... You wake him up."
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Santa and Banta were looking at an Egyptian Mummy at a museum. Santa: Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Banta: Yes you are right. See lorry number is also written BC 1760 !!!
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Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chicks to begin with. A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chicks because all of the first lot had died. Another month later he was back at the dealers for another hundred chicks, for the second lot had also died. 'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa. 'I think I'm planting them too deep.'
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Personal Manager to New job applicant: "Why did your manager fire you?"
"Well a manager is the man who stands around and watches others work, right? " the young applicant replied.
"Yes, but why did he fire you?"
"He was jealous of me. A lot of workers thought i was the manager!"
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Customer care officer: I need a product identification no: right now and may I help u in finding it out?
Cust: sure
CCO: could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?
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A tourist goes to Africa and asks his tourist guide while walking in the jungle, “Are we safe here? Aren’t there cannibals around here?”
And the tourist guide says, “Yes. You can be sure there is no cannibals in Africa.”
And the tourist says, “But there may be still some cannibals.”
And the tourist guide says, “No, rest assured. We ate the last one last Monday.”
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Tourist: "Look Guide, Here are some LION tracks."
Guide : "Good. You see where they go and i will find out where they came from!".
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The Judge ruled: "You put him to sleep... You wake him up."
——————————-
Santa and Banta were looking at an Egyptian Mummy at a museum. Santa: Look so many bandages, pakka lorry accident case.
Banta: Yes you are right. See lorry number is also written BC 1760 !!!
——————————-
Santa Singh decided to start a chicken farm so he bought a hundred chicks to begin with. A month later he returned to the dealer for another hundred chicks because all of the first lot had died. Another month later he was back at the dealers for another hundred chicks, for the second lot had also died. 'But I think I know where I'm going wrong,' said Santa. 'I think I'm planting them too deep.'
——————————-
Personal Manager to New job applicant: "Why did your manager fire you?"
"Well a manager is the man who stands around and watches others work, right? " the young applicant replied.
"Yes, but why did he fire you?"
"He was jealous of me. A lot of workers thought i was the manager!"
——————————-
Customer care officer: I need a product identification no: right now and may I help u in finding it out?
Cust: sure
CCO: could u left click on start and do u find 'My Computer'?
Cust: I did left click but how the hell do I find your computer?
——————————-
A tourist goes to Africa and asks his tourist guide while walking in the jungle, “Are we safe here? Aren’t there cannibals around here?”
And the tourist guide says, “Yes. You can be sure there is no cannibals in Africa.”
And the tourist says, “But there may be still some cannibals.”
And the tourist guide says, “No, rest assured. We ate the last one last Monday.”
——————————-
Tourist: "Look Guide, Here are some LION tracks."
Guide : "Good. You see where they go and i will find out where they came from!".
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